The War

  This is not my usual parenting post, because I am at war. I am at war with the crows in the back yard. At first I thought I was at war with only one crow. Yesterday I realized that my crow foe had brought in reinforcements. There are now two of them. Let me go back to the start of the war.

It all began when the original crow foe started washing his food in our kids’ water table. Yes, that is correct. Washing his food. My husband didn’t believe me at first either. Yesterday he bore witness to the food washing.

Clearly this is unacceptable. So I  put the lid on the water table before we went for a walk. I didn’t realize that this simple act would escalate as quickly as it did.

When we returned from our walk, the crow had poop bombed our entire deck. No, not just 1 or 2 spots. Literally, over 20 poop splats all over the deck, chairs, patio table, deck rails, everything. The war had begun  in earnest.

The next time I spotted the evil crow, he was trying to sneak a look at the water table situation again. Fortunately I was on a chair with the water hose within reach. Bye bye crow, for the moment.

A few days later, hubby was defrosting meat for a bbq on the deck. He stepped inside for 5 minutes. 5 MINUTES! When I looked out the window, the crow had pecked through all 3 packages of meat. The bastard. He was clearly keeping a close eye on us in order to have pounced on the meat so quickly. We are being spied on by crows.

Yesterday after the kids went to bed, I noticed that we had forgotten to put the lid back on the water table. Now there were 2 crows washing food. Hubby ran outside, the crows flew off, he followed up with a retaliatory spray from the hose in their direction, and then dumped the contaminated water out of the water table.

I have now placed the spray hose just outside of our patio door. Our next step is to purchase a super soaker to hang above the kitchen sink. It’s a perfect spot to hit any unwanted creature lurking on the back deck.

We will be ready for you crows.

Photo credit:


About dirtyrottenparenting

I'm a parent of two lovely (most of the time) children. I work full time out of the home and I don't cook well, bake, sew, or do crafty things. I keep my high heels and jewelry at my office because there's no point in having them at home.
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9 Responses to The War

  1. Sounds as if you have a bit of a problem on your hands! As a matter of interest the Crow family are amongst the most intelligent of the birds. To my eye (in the UK), the bird in the picture is a Rook – Corvus frugilegus, not sure if that’s helpful, or relevant. Good luck.

  2. Kathy V. says:

    You should get a cat for your yard. A really big one. Like a bobcat.

  3. Pingback: Wicked Smart Crows | dirtyrottenparenting

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