In a stroke of parenting genius, I have made a race of the kids getting dressed in the morning. First, we all sit down for the breakfast that occasionally never ends. More toast. More cereal. More toast. More cereal. I don’t know where they’re putting it all, it is being eaten because I check under their booster seats. Although some days they don’t eat anything, probably to make room for the never-ending breakfast days.
After breakfast, the kids race to get their clothes on. It’s pure brilliance on my part. Both kids dress themselves. Both kids are dressing as fast as they can. They even beg me to set a timer. You’d think it would be a win-win all around.
But no. Only one of them can win.
Son: Mommy, I won. That means sister lost.
Mommy: You were first. But your sister still won against the timer.
Son: No Mommy, I’m the winner. She’s not the winner.
Daughter: I’m the winner.
Mommy: You can have a first winner and a second winner. Your sister is the second winner.
Son: There’s no such thing as a second winner.
It’s a losing battle to try to convince the little guy about the existence of a second place winner. And then they race to the bathroom to see who get’s there first to brush their teeth. Sometimes I manage to convince them to race getting their boots and jackets on, and to get out into their seats in the van.
One day my son will find it much harder to win against his little sister. It’s easy for a 4-year-old to beat a 2-year-old.